SURPRISE

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STOP, reverse, erase….

Miss B and J are back on again. I think my head left still spinning…

I have know this for a while, but I better just say it like it is… these two affect me way too much. Duh duh duhhhhh. I feel pathetic. What goes on with them shouldn’t be something that alters my day or my mood. This has got to stop. Why am I letting it upset me? Again, it’s got to stop. The only thing that should be affecting me is the protection of my kids. The rest of it is not my business.

Sometimes there is a small bit of satisfaction when I hear about their issues. But it hurts and upsets me every time they get back and shove it all over social media and in front of my face at my kids activities. It’s comical. I know the drill by now.

J’s cousin is a good friend of mine still and isn’t that close to him and his family. We were talking today and just like a lot of you, she feels like I need to put my foot down and start setting my boundaries, starting with the fact that he completely ignores what’s in the divorce decree. It’s always at his convenience. He is the one that wanted us to not have sleepovers with the opposite sex unless we were married when the kids were in our care, now he just ignores that. When I told him that it has to stop, he said “Stop being a jealous ex wife and get over yourself. She is a girlfriend of 4 years and someone that is going to be in their lives indefinitely, so move on.” So I am not dealing with a normal human being here. I haven’t brought it up since. So I’ve got to come up with a game plan that if he doesn’t stick to the decree, then shit is going to go down. No more being nice, and being taken advantage of. Who gives a shit what I think, right?  I am the mother of these kids and I  better start earning some God damn respect. Enough is enough. I am not sure how I am going to go about it all, but I better start getting a game plan in action. My kids deserve better. J go do what you want with Miss B, just leave our kids out of it.

So cheer me on while I put my big girl panties on.

xoxo

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7 thoughts on “SURPRISE

  1. Yes, by all means, it’s way past time to put your big girl panties on. Like another blog reader has done (in her own situation), have absolutely NO communication with your ex (or Miss J or anyone else that he hangs around with), Have no phone, email, nor Facebook contact. Only your lawyer should deal with him. It’s the only way to handle things and get closure for you and your kids. Trust me.

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  2. don’t let him manipulate you with the scorned wife shit into not standing up for your kids – I agree with Rob you either need to sign up for the Family Wizard or all communication via text/email nothing that can’t be documented – don’t let him intimidate you. You might also want to visit One Mom’s Battle and join their boards – lots of good advice there. You already know their relationship is unhealthy – she told you all their secrets – don’t fall for the spackle (visit ChumpLady also and read about spackle lol) – all those pics and stuff is just to make themselves feel better you know what their relationship is really like that’s why you left. He’s never going to be any different with any other woman it’s always gonna be the same. You are the lucky one – you got away.

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    1. I LOVED this comment. This helps me so much. I know ALL these things but I start forgetting and allowing his bullshit to upset me and affect me. I will look up those sites. I need all the help and support I can get. I hate this man so much. I got all these messages today questioning me on stuff with our kids.. telling me to get stuff from their teachers. GO GET IT YOURSELF!! Ugh. He wants receipts of everything I’ve paid for.. Well damnit, I want the same thing back from him. Sorry I had to vent! lol Hope all is well with you. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment! Means a lot to me. xoxo

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      1. you’re very welcome – it’s hard not to fall for their bs they are so convincing but once you start reading those sites I recommended you will start to see through his manipulations – as Chump Lady says “You are mighty!”

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